Havana. Changkat Bukit Bintang, KL. Crocodiles. If You Can Beat 'Em, Eat 'Em.

from Paranoid Android by Paranoid Android

"A communist is like a crocodile : when it opens its mouth you cannot tell whether it is trying to smile or preparing to eat you up" - Sir Winston Churchill

Substitute the word communist with Politician and that sums up how i feel about Politicians in Malaysia. Thank goodness something good came out of the recent debacle. A lot of love and goodness, from all walks of life and all colours and creed.


A group of youths have taken to initiative to come together, bridging the boundaries of race and religion to re-assure everybody that "Everything is gonna be alright", passing out flowers to everybody who walked pass them. Would have waited for Marina Mahathir to grace the occasion as well, but I had to rush off to Low Yatt to get my BB Bold II (BB 9700), the current love of my life.

It's not exactly the proper time to celebrate, but Ciki and I decided to do lunch together, and having having read Sean's post about Crocodile meat, we decided to pop over to Havana. We wanted to work some white magic to rid our nation from some evil spell that has made a lot of people irrational and moronic.


The ritual began with the offering of a jug of Sangria, with hints of cinnamon and loads of fresh lime and green apples. The Sangria that was blended by Havana would have made Zeus fly down from Mount Olympus to join us at Changkat, as one sip of this beautiful nectar would have calmed Juno's wrathful jealousy. Slowly, Ciki fell into a deep trance and was visited by Bacchus or Dionysus (his roman name).


"Drink!", said Dionysus. "It's Ribena!". And I drank and drunk, drunk and drank. In a fit of Bacchanalian stupor, I was transported to another place and time. In this dreamy world, I saw a crawfish. A mean nasty crawfish with nasty pincers, whose was was contorted with a perpetual smug smirk. Behind him were his band of brother. All of them looked the same. It was surreal.

"Who are you?", the crawfish squealed.
"Erm.... The Paranoid Android. And you?..."
"I'm Bigot Bardot. Meet my brothers Xeno-phobe, Ig-no-rance, Self-Right-shuss, Pre-joo-dis and Koh-Rup_Shen. We belong to the Merry Idiotic Brothers of Intolerance."
Remembering Dionysus who gave me the Silver Kris and my promise to bath it with the blood of intolerance, I pulled it out from the sheath and plunged it into their hearts, my eyes filled with tears that they still existed at this day and age.

I brought their sorry carcasses to the chef at Havana. He duly chopped their flesh up, mixed it with some mashed potatos, onion, garlic, celery and pepper, breaded it and fried it and turned them into Crawfish Boulette. Light and Crispy exterior with a luxuriously flavoured interior, both Dionysus and I polished the Boulettes and toasted to the extinction of Bigot Bardot and his merry band of intolerant, idiotic brothers.


"Drink, Android. You are now ready for the next test.", Dionysus exhorted me. And I drank and drunk and drank and drunk more of the delicious nectar. Again I was transported to another ethereal world, but this time it bore an unbearable stench that was fragrant initially yet disturbingly, had a bottom note of rotting, putrid flesh.

And in that stinky world, I came face to face with X3-mism. It looked like a wolf with a forced beatific smile and was wearing a cape made of lamb fleece.

"Who in God's name are you?", he snarled at me.

"The Android", I stuttered. "I know you. You are the one who always Talk about God, Fight for God and get Agitated about God. Yet you never do what god tells you. Be meek and turn the other cheek. Bah! You talk about God's attributes yet do not display any of it. Compassion, Mercy and Love are all alien to you".

"How dare you insult my God?", the wolf in sheep's clothing snarled.

"Hello, Dolt! I am insulting you. Not your God. Your God is good, but you are bad", I retorted.

"NO! You swine. You insulted my God and I am going to kill you!", it ranted like a mad man.

I had no choice. In order to silence him I took out my sword of knowledge and enlightenment and lobbed of it's sorry head. I carried it's carcass back to Havana and the Chef turned it into an Andouille Sausage to be used in concocting the Jambalaya. Dionysus and I marveled at the the dish when it was served. The chicken meat chunks and Prawns were beautifully fried, light and crispy. But when I dug into the rice, I crinkled my nose.

"What's wrong?", Dionysus asked me.

"The rice..... It tastes weird and very gamey".

Dionysus dug into the rice and fished out a piece of sausage. The same sausage that was made from the meat of wolf in sheep's clothing.

"Imagine this plate of Jambalaya to be a country. Although X3-mism dead, the stench is still strong enough to permeate through every grain of rice, causing a discordant note. That is why everybody must be vigilant and nip it in the bud. It is easy for people to demand things from others. Demand to use this or that. Demand to stop using this and that. But the proper thing that is demanded from their faith in Almighty is for them to change themselves and transform their life to be a beacon of love and faith. That is the most difficult thing to do. Many people seem to be fighting for the cause of Almighty, but if you see through them, they are just a bunch of narcissistic ego maniacs. They misuse the name Almighty so that they appear to be champions of their cause, and hence gain adulation and respect from others. They do not love the Almighty. They love themselves."

"You shall know the tree by the fruit it bears. Be patient!", Dionysus said. "As a parting gift, I brought you some crocodile meat from Australia."

The Chef had grilled the crocodile meat on skewers and it was served with some salsa thingy.

"It tastes like chicken! But it is so, so, so very tough! Barely edible without the sauce!", I exclaimed.

"Politicians are thick skinned. Hence the tough meat. And deep down inside, bad politicians are chickens. They do everything for political survival. They are not brave enough to change what is wrong for the fear of losing support. Not everybody is like the intellectual Gus Dur. His views on tolerance and pluralism is unusually courageous!", said Dionysus. "And now, I must leave you, my friend. Go forth with the message of love from me, a Pagan God, and a figment of your over active imagination".

Ciki snapped out of her trance and was again her beautiful, energetic self.

A tall tale, badly written by me and a departure from the norm. As I walked down Changkat I felt better, my conversation and adventures with a creature I summoned from the depths of my mind was cathartic. And I appeal to all of you reading this blog to give some thought to what your faith is, and what it really means to you. As for the Android, it is painfully easy. It only believes in reason and rationality. But if everything fails, it believes in love and the universal goodness of man. I'm a hopeless romantic.

Havana

No. 2 & 4, Lorong Sahabat
Off Changkat Bukit Bintang,
50200 Kuala Lumpur.

Add: Just came across MM's post here. Please click. FYI, The Android is neither a Muslim or a Christian, but feels that to try a divine matter in a court of man made law is undignified and ridiculous. It should be solved by an open dialogue by all parties.

Treat yourself to an indulgent Sunday roast

The Caesar Salad with everything we love in it.KUALA LUMPUR, December eleven we was dazzled by a colours, shapes as well as presentation of a food during a Sunday Roast lunch during a Ritz Carlton Kuala Lumpur. The wall of charming macaroons as well as cookies was riveting. The toffee apples, as well as a building of sweet, sticky profiteroles were all beckoning.Where does one begin? Those savvy with a smorgasboard would go for a fines de claire oysters, which one of us did. we similar to it which they have been shucked there as well as then for you.The terrines have been unequivocally hard to resist. we let my eye settle upon a many attractive starters a terrines. There was a fungus terrine studded with pistachios, a salmon terrine had a blob of caviar in a centre, an additional terrine had a huge scallop staring during you, as well as there was additionally a turkey roulade, with a turn of cranberry sauce. The fungus terrine was a most appropriate we favourite a pistachios in it, as well as a aroma as well as texture of a mushroom. The salmon terrine blended well with a caviar a salty tang opposite light benevolence of salmon.I done a beeline as well for a Caesars Salad tossed in a parmesan cheese play as well as finished with crispy beef bacon, anchovies, sun-dried tomatoes as well as a oh-so-lovely truffles. we couldnt stop eating this salad; it was scrumptious.Of march one should not ignore a salmon gravlax, with embellishments such as horseradish, white onions, olives, capers as well as sour cream. Again we could eat a lot of this too.Im a bit confused about a white asparagus deteriorate these days. It used to be in April, but its November as well as they have been here during a Ritz, with skinny fry beef slices wrapped turn a small unequivocally juicy as well as honeyed white asparagus.The salmo! n encrou te is value tasting as well for its light, skinny fritter descending into flaked salmon as well as turmeric rice with egg yolk, in a really British kedgeree.You can have your collect of cold starters during a buffet. we had an oyster shooter in a chopped tomatoes gazpacho, as well as dual glorious de claires later, we was ready for a Sunday Roast. we wished we had room for a raclette cheese which Im crazy about, or a foie gras. Perhaps a small sashimi as well as sushi which were additionally really tempting.But we should save room for a roast. Its elderly Black Angus budding rib which has been slow roasted in a oven for five hours. Its served with Yorkshire pudding, stewed cabbage, roasted noisette potatoes. The chef figure a beef was a categorical event: a meat was pinkish as well as moist as well as drizzled with bone pith jus done an glorious categorical course.The fry turkey fell a small flat. we suspicion it was as well dry. And it had looked so promising before it was carved. Temptation in a form of a profiterole building opposite a wall of macaroons as well as cookies.Then it was dessert time: upon my plate was a dim chocolate vessel filled with blackberries, strawberry, blueberries as well as raspberries, with gold flakes sticking to a small of a fruits. It was heavenly. we couldnt conflict a ambience of a profiteroles or a lemon meringue spicy which had a superb change of a spicy with a sweet, upon a crumbly pastry.I could have helped myself during a chocolate fountain, dipping in it a uninformed fruits as well as charming marshmallows or picking a something good to eat off a chocolate tree but there was no some-more room in my tummy.Scrumptious chocolate vessel with profiteroles as well as lemon ! meringue tart.The Sunday Roast during a Lobby Lounge is from 11.30am to 3pm every week, during RM130++ per person, drinks not included. A three-piece jazz band plays whilst we eat, as well as its only a place to be for a slow lunch which builds up to a honeyed crescendo. There will be an Eggnog Sunday Roast upon Boxing Day.Theres an afternoon tea too, from 3pm to 5pm, labelled during RM68++. Call 03-2142 8000.
Living & Leisure Buzz

Sasha Rowenas creations at Jendela KL in Starhill Gallery A Journey Through Time 2010

Luscious colours, imaginative contrasts as well as unusual inspirationgive Sasha Rowenas creations a distinctive flair of their own. What really sets them apart, however, is a strong union of internal enlightenment in to her designs. Rowena weaves an East-meets-West thread through all her work, fusing ? la mode materials as well as flamboyant colours with traditional influences which give her designs an general appeal.

Sasha Rowenas high-end eponymous label carries a variety of accessories trimming from outlandish handbags as well as purses to neat credit card holders as well as cell phone covers.

Her customers is not dynamic by age but by perspective daring, trend-setting women covet these singular designs. The accessories have been practical, fashionable as well as memorable.

I love what we do. we hope to set up Sasha Rowena in to a homegrown powerhouse brand as well as put Malaysia upon a map. we wish to have a standalone boutique of my own someday, to have Hollywood celebrities carrying my bags upon their arms, says a up-and-coming designer.

The brands sign is The best of both worlds as well as a truth reflects me as a person, says Rowena. we studied in Australia as well as we mostly transport around a world but we have always been grounded to my Asian roots. It is always about balance. Hence, East meets West!

Below: Dato Dr James Dawos Mamit, a Deputy Minister of Tourism, during a media tour of Starhill Gallery, with a vivacious Sasha Rowena.

The law student felt constrained to aspire to conceptualizing after struggling to find a handbag she liked in internal stores. It was during her early experiments with colour palettes as well as thematic concepts which Rowena was invited by Jendela KL to take part in a CSR program, Artists @ Jendela KL. The 24-year-olds new thing in to a conform industry in 2009 was greeted with howling acclaim as well as soap-box reviews as her alloy designs stole a hearts of internal as well as unfamiliar fashionistas.

Sasha Rowena handbags as well as accessories have been displayed during Jendela KL in Starhill Gallery as well as Shuz in Bangsar Village II, as well a! s season ally during a Four Seasons Resort in Langkawi. For some-more report upon a Sasha Rowena brand or a engineer herself, visit her Facebook air blower page, Sasha Rowena or email your inquiries to sasha@sasharowena.com.

A Journey Through Time IV will run from 2 to eleven Dec (10 am to 10 pm) during a Starhill Gallery. The highly anticipated Starhill Gallery Watch of a Year award rite will be held upon a final day of a event eleven Dec with a uncover from renowned Australian songstress Deltra Goodrem.

For enquiries about A Journey Through Time IV pleasantly hit +603-2782 3855 or record upon to www.ajourneythroughtime.com.my

Book Review & Writing Tips

Toronto, Teatro and Today Shows

The final recap. Two book signings as well as two shows. But you suspicion you would hang it all up in a single post. you finished a last book signings for 2010 this past week in Toronto. Its kind of sad. you really enjoyed meeting you all as well as saying your smiling faces as well as sharing baked sweat bread cocktail stories. It was a blast. And Toronto was no different. Just a lot colder.

While you was in a city, you also had a opportunity to be upon Canada AM. Its similar to Canadas version of a Today Show.

We talked about these.

And these.

This is Heather. She was a food stylist who took caring of preparing them since it would have been difficult to travel with Reindeer antlers still in tact. Thank you we did a illusory job upon them.

Here have been a hosts Beverly as well as Seamus. Both so nice.

If youd similar to to watch a Canada AM Segment, heres a link.

That evening, you had a initial book signing in Toronto during a store called Teatro Verde.

This present store is positively beautiful. Gorgeous! When you walked in, you felt right during home. Like being in sugarland.

Teatro Verde. Teatro Verde. Teatro Verde.

I cant contend it enough. If you have been nearby Toronto, you should stop in this store.

I pa id for a couple of these ornaments.

And if you didnt already have one, you would have paid for a single of these guys, too.

The initial smiling faces to hail me were Marian from Sweetopia (on a right) as well as her crony Kim.

Marian creates a many pleasing cookies with a splendidly whimsical charm.

She brought me these. Amazing detail!

And she brought all of these which have been designs of a small of a baked sweat bread pops from a book. you squealed! Im still squealing! Thank you so much!

Teatro was really a fun place to have a signing. you consider everybody had a good time.

People joked around. you shopped.

And talked to Food Network Canada. Hi. you enjoyed a chat.

Here have been a owners of a store Shawn as well as Michael. They were great. Thanks for carrying me.

Then upon Saturday, you went to a secon! d book s igning in Toronto during Williams-Sonoma.

Again, you was greeted with cookies. She was initial in line with this pleasing cupcake cocktail cookie arrangment.

I adore this. Everyone raising their palm has made baked sweat bread pops. Impressive.

I eventually got to encounter Melissa as well as Rich. Hi guys!

Rich due to Melissa with a small assistance from my blog. You can read about it here:

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I adore these guys as well as was so honored to be a part of such a noted eventuality in their lives. After wiping my eyes Yes, some-more tears in Toronto a book signing began.

And so did a silliness.

Then, you was utterly held off guard by Carolynn.

She made baked sweat bread pops. But not only any baked sweat bread pops.

Perfectly themed baked sweat bread pops as well as in their own honeyed setting, too.

And she drove roughly five hours with her crony Candy to move them to Williams-Sonoma.

Wait till you see them.

I could die. Moo! se as we ll as deer as well as a cutest small beaver family sitting upon their wood dam. And a wintery white owl to top it off.

Seriously, Carolynn You outdid yourself. These have been FANTASTIC! Thank you.

And thank you too, for my new super lovable t-shirt. Love it!

Yep. There were boys during a event, too. And this time, during slightest a single wasnt getting books sealed for his mother or girlfriend or sister.

This a single was for him.

He made a reindeer as well as Santa shawl baked sweat bread pops! YAY!

You cant tell Im getting a small improved during stealing it, though some-more tears here. She was so sweet.

And so were a kids which came out.

This small guy however, did not similar to carrying his picture taken.

Luckily, she did.

Oh yeah you met Savannah as well as Janet from Redpath Sugar as well as got to fool around around in a cutest vintage truck.

My mother as well as you had a good time. Thanks for creation Toronto so memorable.

And if you stop in a Toronto Williams-Sonoma store, please make sure to contend hi to Scott for me. Hes a best!

Phew!

Ok. That was Toronto.

But prior to you flew home you made a pitstop in New York City.

This past Tuesday you was upon a Today Show. Yikes.

On Monday you met with a food stylists, Bianca as well as Lish to hope for for a following day.

We planned all out.

Post-its come in handy.

And so do cameras. My mother snapped this so you could recollect where all was going to be placed a subsequent morning.

So you could use which night. So you could prepare.

But you didnt. you motionless it would be some-more fun to do it upon a fly.

Heres a Today Show twitpic from a segment.

Andheres a couple to a Today Show segment with Hoda as well as Kathie Lee. This was a bit some-more fast-paced than a Canada AM shave since you were essentially rolling as well as dipping as well as there were three of us. But oh so fun.

Okay, thats it.

Done.

Now, you can bake.

Book Review & Writing Tips